Wednesday, March 10
Surgery went well yesterday. We had every hope that we’d be going home sometime this morning and everything was falling into place to do so. However, after physical therapy things changed a bit. Jeff began to experience unmanageable pain. He had to go back on morphine. Not going home today. Hopefully sometime tomorrow. One other little revelation today. Jeff has diabetes. His blood sugar was up at Grady in Atlanta, but that’s normal for an accident victim. We have wondered about this possibility previously and so were not completely surprised. Now we look at a significant permanent life change even when recovery has been accomplished.
Expanded thoughts:
OK. Time to take a breath and focus. This is not going to be fun. Well, I knew that. But I’m wondering at this point if I have any idea of what lies ahead of me/us? It’s a relatively easy step to look to the Lord immediately and have faith and the right focus. The Lord has so blessed me thus far to enable me to look to Him and rest. But let’s be honest here. I’m no angel. Will I be able to continue to allow the Lord to sustain me or will I go off “half-cocked” fretting and worrying, doubting and whining? It would seem that Jeff and I are in similar places. He’s right on the edge of successfully handling the pain, but he is questioning his ability to do so. OK for now, but how long can he continue to “take” the discomfort with which he’s dealing? Me? I’m weary, I’m sick and I don’t want to do this anymore. I was desperate when I had no answers, didn’t know what was going on. I feel I am approaching that spot again now WITH the answers and KNOWING what’s going on. Also, a little cherry on top of this whole experience. Jeff has been diagnosed with diabetes. ARE YOU KIDDING ME`? Ok. Wait. Really ? (slight smile…) Well, isn’t that interesting…..NOT! Fine. Why don’t we just go ahead and talk with the financial offices for both hospitals while we are at it! Bring it on! But good luck finding me, ‘cause I’m outta here!
OK. Seriously. A little glimpse of where I am, but not of where I will end up. The Lord loves me. AND He is patient. He will wait for me so we can walk through this together. I love Him.
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In God's compost pile . . . steamin' and stinkin' . . . BUT growin'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Been there, done that. You'll be fine. Baby steps. One hour at a time. License to be human. Supernatural in every way. Amazing grace.
ReplyDeleteWe are still praying. I so appreciate your honesty. It makes your faith so much more believable.
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